I saw this on PT and I thought it was brilliant! Although I'm pretty sure I'm fatorexic! There are times when I look in the mirror and think I'm actually making progress and my stomach is starting to shrink ..... and then I walk away from the mirror/sit down/get dressed/whatever and my rolls suddenly protrude. Does that even make sense?!?! Ugh, it's frustrating! Or one day I'll be feeling really good about myself, everything fits, I look good, feel good, getting tons of compliments ... and then the next day I'm having a complete fat day ... rolls hanging out, clothes not fitting. I'm not trying to be dramatic, but I really do hate myself :(
I feel like I'm stuck in some sort of limbo-type-thing ....
I want to do anything I have to do to lose weight. I'm willing to count calories, overexercise blah blah blah, but then the fat girl takes over and it just seems SO much easier to shove food in my mouth and worry about the reprecussions later! And then I just want to give up on this whole ED thing and have some sort of happy relationship with food and my body. But I've never had this, so how do I even start now? I'm disappointed in myself for not having a "proper" ED, I want to try harder to be "better" at it, and then I hate myself for even thinking that. It's like I can't even make up my freakin mind about it!
Ugh, I'm not even making sense!
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